Hello there! It feels really strange to be sitting, writing in this blog again. Fun, stressful, exciting things happened, and first I was too busy to keep up with blogging, and then a horrible, awful, heartbreaking thing happened, and I was just too broken to even think about blogging.
But here I am. I've made it through the worst of it (well, I bloody hope I have), and I'm starting to pick my life back up again. I miss the routine and fun of blogging, so I'm going to ease myself back with an follow up to one of my last posts... a list of insecurities that I was SURE wouldn't actually turn into anything. Ahem. Who knew I was so good at predicting the future?
1. Insecurity: starting a new job!
I started my new job at the Edinburgh International Film Festival one week before the programme launched, and just a month before the Festival started. Starting a new job is scary, regardless of how prepared you are, and it was just a whirlwind of exhaustion, fun, stress, excitement and films. Some things went really well, some things were INSANELY stressful, and most times I just crossed my fingers and hoped for the best.
Luckily, the core team were absolutely lovely and welcoming (and answered all of my daft questions), and I got through in one piece, and now have a year to shape my department into how I want it before the next Festival hits. I have so much to do (so much, my god), but the team is lovely, and the Festival is really cool, they sent me on the world's most motivating training course, AND my office is in a cinema (which is a nice place to be).
2. Insecurity: my relationship!
Well. This has been the most horrendous thing that has happened to me in a very, very long time. Out of the blue my relationship ended, and it was just AWFUL. We had been together for years and had lovely future plans that just suddenly stopped, and it rocked me to the core.
I naively thought I had already gone through my big adult break up, so coming to terms with being single again (so alone!) and 30 years old (so old!) has been a bit of an adjustment. But my head and heart are sorting themselves out, and I am once again very, very appreciative of my wonderful friends who have rallied around me all summer. I drank loads of wine (too much wine), I cried watching Bridget Jones, I cut my hair to fulfill all break up cliches, and then I went on an impromptu trip to Venice with two of my pals because moping is for losers.
3. Insecurity: being a rubbish blogger
I am a rubbish blogger, I'm sorry. It's been over three months since I last updated, and I have no idea if I have just driven all of my usual readers away (er, if so, come baaaack), but I hope not.
I am determined to get back in the swing of things though, and I have loads to talk about. I went to Copenhagen! And Croatia! And Venice! The August Edinburgh Festivals are in full swing, and there's ace shows to recommend (hot men performing zombie circus, anyone?)! Aaaand I'll probably have a bit of a reflection on life and love (because rambling cheers me up & everyone's lovely when I whinge on about life being tricky). Plus I bought ace new shoes!
So thanks for sticking with me, if you have done. Here's to the rest of 2016 not quite being such a bastard, aye?
Sorry to hear you've been having a shitty time of things. I can relate, having gone through a massive breakup just before my 30th birthday last year and generally having the worst time of things ever.
ReplyDeleteThings can only get better! <3 xx
Welcome back! Breakups are always hard but you just have to do the stereotypical wine-and-Bridget-Jones thing. It's the law. You're about to discover who you are again. So exciting despite the awfulness! Yay! xxx
ReplyDeleteso I saw you yesterday, in Georges square, and was going to say hello-i-like-your-blog. but 1. thought that may be weird, 2. I was in a rush for a show. but I just wanted to say I'm glad you are blogging again, and I hope things keep improving, break ups suck.
ReplyDeleteI am so glad to hear from you again! I'm sorry that you had some rough times in there, but you seem to be dealing with it like the true boss lady you are. Best wishes for the new job xx
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